I thereafter enacted the Affordable Running Shoes Edict (ARSE). Under the ARSE, Nike, Reebok, Asics, Adidas, and the like (collectively, “Shoe Companies”) must come forward with a marketplace allowing increased access to their costly shoes, especially for people who are unable to afford them under current pricing configurations. Furthermore, employers of 15 persons or more must pay their employees at least enough to be able to afford two pairs per year of these new, less expensive, but still high-quality shoes. Alternatively, employers may enact a private, employer-sponsored Running Shoe Voucher Program (RSVP), through which employees will receive stipends twice per year to purchase the high-quality, lower cost running shoes.
Worth Noting: Individuals are not required to furnish proof of inability to afford running shoes in order to claim running shoe benefits under the ARSE. Additionally, while participation is not required, 100% of Marilynopolis citizens are invited to take advantage of ARSE benefits. Persons who opt-out of ARSE benefits will be responsible for their own shoe purchases at potentially higher prices during the current benefit period. Those persons may change their election during the following year’s open-enrollment period.
Please note that I allowed Shoe Companies more than sufficient time to determine how they will design their new marketplace so as to reach and remain in compliance. Also included was a generous grace period for employers. During that period, no employers were penalized for failure or inability to increase workers’ pay for ARSE shoe purchases or to develop an employer-sponsored RSVP.
Unfortunately, however, because I do not control the marketplace, and because private-sector employers and Shoe Companies of Marylinopolis are built on a framework of capitalism (rather than socialism or communism), I failed to take into account that there is no compelling reason for Shoe Companies or private-sector employers to lower their profitability, solely because I, as ruler of Marilynopolis, declared that they should. Further complicating matters of the ARSE is the fact that I did not enact quality-control measures in conjunction with the Edict. I have, therefore, taken heat for the substandard shoes manufactured by Shoe Companies during the ARSE program. Some individuals and employee rights activists have grown upset by the fact that certain employers have had to cut their workforces in order to afford or avoid the cost incurred by ARSE.
Running shoes certainly are confusing. The legislation process is a real pain in the ARSE.
